Connecting People to Small Groups - A Followup Question

This entry was posted on 9/23/2006 9:41 PM and is filed under Small Groups.

Many of you wrote excellent comments on small group connections. Thanks! The key thread is that personal invitations and personal assistance are a better way to help people connect with groups. The signups work better for a short term study such as 40 Days. So here is my followup question: Why don't more group members invite others to try their groups? How can we encourage more of that? Help me out here! To summarize the previous blog thread: 1. Most people really appreciated seeing the pastoral staff share as a team last week 2. Many felt that personal contacts are a better way to help people connect, but the Sunday highlight was very effective in raising the value of belonging to one 3. Most people thoroughly appreciated the drama; some thought it should have covered a healthy scenario; others were glad it did not 4. Several expressed appreciation for the emphasis on training and support for small group leaders, and for the attempt to raise the quality of the small groups 5. Many of the reasons some folks are not in group have nothing to do with the church. Sometimes their lives are very full with career, family and service; perhaps some help with maintaining a Biblical balance is needed And then let's remember that over 50% of the adults who attend Wintonbury ARE involved in small groups already!

 

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• 9/24/2006 2:48 PM Darci Melchor wrote:
  I think Dave summarized well what we are learning in small group ministry in churches around the country. Personal invitations work best. I am encouraged by the quiet example of Al and Karol Niederfringer. They were encouraged a year ago by Brett Carlson in the kiddie pool at the entrance to "just jump in" to an LBM group their first day at WBC! Now after attending a year and thoroughly enjoying their group, they are busily recruiting new people for their group. How? They reach across the aisle on Sunday. No nametags, no positions, just a desire to share what they have been blessed with.
  Reply to this
• 9/24/2006 10:15 PM Liz Martinez wrote:
  I think there are probably many reasons more people don't invite others to their small groups and it depends on the person and the small group. But here are some of the thoughts I have on it:
  A- they don't know people that well and don't even know if they would want to join a small group. To deal with this, I think 1- the church body needs to continue to emphasize small groups (as was done wonderfully on Sept 17th) 2- there needs to be a way for a person to not only indicate they want to be in a small group, but also somehow indicate what kind of small group they'd like to be a part of which will help match them with the right group and 3- then they can be matched up with a current small group and personally invited.
  B- Many small groups are at their limit of remiaing a "small group" which is what our young couples group experienced this past year. If we invited more couples the group would too large for the kind of personal connection that is part of a small group. In our case, we were fully aware that there were others who wanted to be in the same type of group that we had, so it was easy for us to decide to form many other groups. In other cases, I might imagine that they just don't know if there are others who would like to be part of their type of group.
  C- It is a comfort thing. People probably get so comfortable with their current small group that they don't want to "stir the pot" so to speak. In that case, they need to be reminded of how much of an impact that the small group has made for them and encouraged that they can help others experience that impact.
  
  I think in many cases the "small group" experience maybe needs to be treated similar to matching people to a ministry. In order for someone to have a good experience serving, they are matched according to their spiritual gifts and the things that they'd like to do-- they aren't just "placed" into a ministry. I think that small groups are similar. For the type of connecting that we'd like to see in the small groups, you can't always just "throw" people together and expect them to develop a great small group. They have to have something else that connects them in some way. I realize finding that is much easier said than done.
  Those are just my thoughts anyway.
  Reply to this
• 9/25/2006 5:46 PM Brett Carlson wrote:
  Darci, thank you for the neat reminder (you pushed the story button)of the LBM series and I think that "divine appointment" is where it starts. I really did enjoy standing in the pool before and after each service for a few weeks just encouraging friends and strangers about "jumping in" to some kind of ministry,(stressing the small groups) and look what the Lord did with that. Despite some comments from some of the brethern I believe God was honored with all of our efforts to promote connecting with each other and volunteering to do something in the body. In my previous blog comment, the piece I quoted was "Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses and some don't turn up at all."
  If we are excited about what Christ is doing in our own lives than we will be spiritually sensitive and excited to invite, encourage, answer questions and guide others to where the Holy Spirit may want them to go. This is all about Him, we can analyze things that may "work" and some that don't and I think that's healthy. But if each of us is truly exemplifying the "fruit of the Spirit" then reaching across the aisle and saying hello to a visitor or someone you don't know should become "natural".
  
  I invited a child (with the permission of her parents)to stand in the kiddie pool with me, she put in her fingers and backed away, came back and put in her arm, backed away, a then "jumped in". She had a blast, laughing giggling and splashing.It took about 10 minutes to get her out. Is this a perfect picture of what we are talking about? We invite and let the Holy Spirit do His work. Are we willing to stand "in the pool"?
  Reply to this
  1. 9/29/2006 10:33 AM Dave Owen wrote:
     Reading the comments from Darci, Liz, and Brett brought to my mind another angle - that many of the fine suggestions are already being done, particularly by Darci, who matches people with groups one to one extremely well. And then people like our small group coaches (Brett, Lori, Uwe, Dawn, Darci and others), who really do "reach across the aisle" and welcome others who might not be connected to a group. You 'guys' are fabulous!
     
     BUT what struck me is how few people realize what they do! It demonstrates their willingness to be Christ's servants. It also demonstrates the need to spread the word, so people know the help is available.
     
     I like Liz's idea of a way to ask people what kind of group they might be seeking. I know we do that already whenever we talk with people, but I am thinking of designing a "small group match request" form that would ask what kind of group, days available, etc. that people are seeking. Perhaps at least some of them would use it as a vehicle to communicate with us so that we can do a more adequate job of matching.
     
     Now the comfort level.........you tell me what we can do to help people break through that. I think some of us introverts will never be comfortable reaching out to new peope - it just has to be an internal value that helps us take external action. What do you think?
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